Round 1: Canadian Music
Spending lots of time working up here in the Canada, I have been barraged by many different types of Canadian music with always the same pre-caution: Americans don't like Canadian Music. Not so fast.
Gettin'er Canadian Music: The New Pornographers, Wolf Parade, Black Mountain, Sam Roberts, and Arcade Fire. Suggested Song of the group: Arcade Fire Rebellion it Rocks.
Ill Canadian Music: Simple Plan, Nickleback (kill me), Three Days Grace, and William Shatner. If you haven't seen William Shatner's Rocketman Youtube video, save yourself the trouble and don't watch it.
Round 2: Soccer
Gettin'er: The United States of America Soccer team made it to the finals of the Confederation Cup, beating probably the top playing team in the World Spain to get there. The Spain win was one of the biggest wins in US history, as Spain was on the longest winning streak in the country and probably favored by 3 goals of the US who beat them 2-0. In the Finals of the Confederation the United States went up 2-0 on BRAZIL at halftime and although they lost 3-2 to BRAZIL, when was the US Soccer team a. in the finals of ANYTHING, b. ever beating BRAZIL or c. beaten a WORLD #1 in SOCCER? Definitely GETTIN'ER!
Ill: Kaka. First of all your name is Cock-ah. Thats pretty Illegitimate you tool. Second of all, you turned down a record 107 million Euros to move to the Premier league, to compete at the highest soccer level available. If you want to be respected in soccer, play against the best, get paid the most, and "just do it." Don't be a pussy and not take the money because you don't know how good your team is going to be. Jump up on that horse and be a man. Besides, the economy sucks, 107 euros could really help you get your name changed dick.
Round 3: Golf
Gettin'er: Lucas Glover. You were able to keep your composure, even when you looked doomed to give the US Open away and pull a Ricky Barnes and bite it. But all through it all, you stuck in there and pulled out some very high pressured shots and my hat is off to you. You have been struggling with your game, and everyone loves a good comeback story.
Ill: I hate to say this, but Tiger Woods, and the Tiger Woods hype. I have been a long time supporter of Tiger, and he is by far my favorite golfer today and will be of all time. But I am sick of every golf reporter picking him to win every event he plays in. Sure, he played phenomenal at the Memorial, and out of no where hit 14/14 fairways on Sunday to shoot 7 under and win, however, that wasn't Bethpage Black in the Rain, with plenty of dog legs, deep thick rough, and lightning fast greens. Unless he wins the British and PGA this year, we need to stop picking him to win every event. And on top of that, Golf reporters need to stop giving their "If not Tiger, than who analysis" because not one person picked Lucas Glover to win, Trevor Immelman to win the Masters, Cabrera in last years Masters, Padraig in his first Major win. Just say, they're all good, I like Mike Weir.
Round 4: Real Pop Music
Gettin'er: Michael Jackson. Enough Said.
Ill: Any crap they play on the radio these days. Again, nuff said.
Round 5: Cell Phones
Gettin'er: This one is pretty obvious, but the iPhone 3GS. The new mobile me functions of the new iPhone are really cool. If you lose your phone, you can log on to a computer and locate your iPhone via GPS. If someone steals your iPhone, you can easily back up all the info in your mobile me before hand, clear the phone's records from a computer, and send your a phone a message that will display on the iPhone's screen such as "Hey ese, return my phone."
Ill: Sprint and Sprint Phones. I have been with spring for a couple years, and have never like one phone they have ever provided. My palm centro is a P.O.S. and when I looked on-line today for a new upgrade, I didn't like any of your options. Thats ok, I'm getting an iPhone when I cancel my service this fall.
Round 6: NBA DRAFT
Gettin'er: No Surprise here again, but the University of Louisville Cardinals. 2 Pitino boys were selected in the to 14, more than any other school, and probably the best nicknames in the draft: T-Will and E5.
Ill: The Cleveland Cavaliers. You've got L money, the best player in basketball, you get him Shaq, for his farewell tour, and then out of no where, when you got rid of Ben Wallace, and could draft the next probably best rebounder in the NBA DeJuan Blair, you pick up Christian Eyenga: NEWS FLASH: They don't play basketball in Congo.
Round 7: What's the point in doing 12 rounds without a little boxing
Gettin'er: Miguel Cotto. I loved your Clottey fight that went the distance. You made me a true believer of what you've got and that fight was probably one of the best I have watched since the glory days of boxing. After an accidental head bunt split open your right eye that bled the entire fight, impairing you vision and ability to see any of Clottey's right punches, you held in their the entire fight when there could have been a no decision before 4 rounds if you wanted to give up. Their shouldn't of even been a split decision, you won outright and If Margarito hadn't been loading his gloves, you'd still have an undefeated record. Can't wait for you to fight Mayweather... please?
Ill: Floyd Mayweather Jr. First time I truly saw you fight was against Oscar de la Hoya, who is my boy and I would have loved to have seen you guys fight when he was in his prime. Besides that, I was a believer of you after you dismantled Ricky Hatton in a blowout but then you just quit. You quit when Boxing is coming back into form with the rise of so many stars in the welters and middles. Right before Marquez, Pacquiao, Cotto, Clottey, Margarito (before the stuff) even Shane Mosley (although you beat him) is on the rise again. Now you were scheduled to fight Marquez and had to delay the fight because of a rib injury. Was this really an injury, or did you just not have enough time to prepare? Too busy partying and doing Sprint commercials? Step up, and show us you still got it. Ill see you Sept. 19.
Round 8: Jordans
Gettin'er: Michael Jordan, always and forever.
Ill: Jeffrey! My man! What happened! We used to be psychology buddies, and I love your Land Rover. I know Illinois has some sweet guards coming in this season, but you easily could have gotten some PT and into a leadership role. I know it must be tough living in your dad's shadow, but you were my boy. I thought we had something. I'm sorry Rory and I dominated you and Calvin Brock at CRCE, I won't do it anymore, I graduated, you can come back to the Illini. Gonna miss you
Round 9: Iran
Gettin'er: The poor story of the girl Neda going to school. Moussavi.
Ill: Ahmadinejad
Round 10: Social Networking
Gettin'er: Pirate Facebook setting, the "you like this" button on on comments, Myspace for Artists/Musicians, Shaq on Twitter.
Ill: Myspace for 17 year old swampers, Facebook "profiles", Signing on twitter and having sex hotlines follow you, facebook advertising, donks friending you because it is cheaper than e-harmony.
Round 11: Moufs
Gettin'er: Megan Fox. Goodness.
Ill: Victoria Beckham, you got a breast reduction. What a shame to society. Its ok, you're still beautiful on the inside.
Round 12: Rednecks
Gettin'er: They're all gettin'er. Especially John F'en Daly. He is my savior, especially when he uses a tall boy as a tee. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dDqbfXj_Wp0
GA GA GA GETTIN'ER!

4 comments:
This blog is definitely "Gettin Er done."
well done AD, well done
Best post so far
also, ROCK!
Post a Comment